Assassin’s Pride: the juvenile anime I wanted but no longer deserve

[Oh, this is a “spoilers but who cares” style post. But who cares, Assassin’s Pride has nothing surprising to spoil.]

My face when watching. But then Kufa does something insane like reattach his own severed arm and I burst out laughing again.

I often feel that much of the online English-language anime commentariat – including myself — have miscalibrated target-demographic detectors, even despite the prevalence of descriptive age-gender labels like “shounen — boy” and “shoujo — girl” across the industry. Why apply adult standards to a series for six-year olds? I don’t know, but a lot of people do.

Ah, but with Assassin’s Pride from this fall 2019 anime season, there can be no doubt: this series is a tweeny delight. I am twelve and want more like this.

Assassin’s Pride cries out for the creation of a wave of teenage fanfiction full of cosplay-in-writing anti-heroes to express the darkness in every youth’s ultimately good soul, if only society would accept their oppressed status as a half-lancanthrope. That is to say, if Assassin’s Pride isn’t fanfiction itself — I mean, check it:

Assassin’s Pride left and Sword Art Online right. Same widow’s peak hair dongle on the male leads and same bunny hair baubles on the female leads. Kirito and Asuna clone characters, check ✓.

Assassin’s Pride is perhaps the most juvenile anime I have ever seen – and I do seek them out with great zeal every season. Let’s skip the plot and character summaries here because if you’ve seen any other shounen adventure series in the past decade or so, you’ve seen Assassin’s Pride; it uses every oldest trick in the inoffensive teenage edge-appeal book. I don’t know how better to structure this sarcastic trope accounting though, so let’s make an arbitrary checklist:

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